What I Know Now

First of all, I gained weight this week.

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But I did much better on tracking my food than I have been, and it takes time to get back in the groove of things. Baby steps. I’ll get there.

I’ve been in a whirlwind for the last month. I haven’t done too many personal posts lately, mostly because it’s really hard to put into words how I’m feeling. But I’ll try. I like lists, so here goes:

What I Know Now

1) Divorce sucks. People get hurt and things get hard. But happiness, or even the hope of happiness, is worth the risk. I’m sorry that my marriage ended, but I’m not sorry that I’m happier now. I deserve happiness. And if you’re reading this and you’re in a shitty situation, you deserve happiness too. If you are looking around thinking “I guess this is the best it’s ever going to be” and aren’t really happy, don’t settle. Because the feeling you should be having is “How did I ever live a day in my life not being this happy?”. That’s how I’ve been ever since Matt came into my life.

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2) It is completely possible to go from being an eternal pessimist

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To being so sunshiny and happy you can’t stand yourself

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I walk around smiling from ear to ear.

3) Love is a powerful, amazing, wonderful thing. And I’m head over heels in it.

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8 Responses to What I Know Now

  1. missmarisol says:

    Please tell me you bought that big ass bear. I don’t know anyone who has ever bought one.

    I am so happy for you. Truly am. You deserve it and so much more.

  2. allofmywords says:

    I am so incredibly happy that you have found happiness.

  3. Good for you! No, I don’t mean it in that sarcastic “GOOD for you!” way. I meant it like “Good for YOU.” No, that sounds sarcastic, too! Let me try rephrasing it: “For you, good!” No! No! That sounds like Yoda! Okay, let me work on it and I’ll get back to you…

  4. Ronni says:

    I don’t post often but found your blog awhile back through a weight loss blog search. Your whole story is really an inspiration. So yes..I am kind of one of those weight blog stalkers. Either way…back to my point!!
    I am so glad that you were strong enough to give yourself the ability to find happiness. Too many of us just settle. We deserve the best!. Enjoy!

    • Thanks for reading and I stalk blogs all the time!
      I will never settle again. I deserve much more than I allowed myself to live with for so long. I know that it’s hard to break away from people that are toxic, but the weight that has been lifted off my shoulders makes it all worth it.

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